Post #5: Darklife Journal - A Day In The Life of a Vorpal Bunny Paladin

(We were originally going to run a puff piece about fear in Second Life, but it appears that our contributor Mentat Patchouli was swallowed up by a Worm. More details in an hour, along with a replacement. Hopefully, a rescue crew if our budget can stretch to it.)

(UPDATED: We were originally going to run a replacement puff piece about Escort Parlours in Second Life, but it appears Gideon Television has done a much better job than any one of us could have done. Those responsible have been shot by the chief, then resurrected, then shot again, ad nauseaum.)

(UPDATED YET AGAIN: And now for something completely different but publishable. Vorpal Bunny Paladin!)

(Patychoulli Woolluhraa in her combat armor. Specially tailored to follow the old rule of armor for women: less coverage, more protection!)

Written thisth Twenty-Nineth Of Decembre, Two Thousande And Sixeth
By: Vorpal Bunny Paladin Neophyte Patychoulli Woolluhraa

Some days, I get asked... "Patychoulli, what is it that you accomplish every day in Agni?" I have a pretty busy schedule, and today I will write about it...

Cock's first crow: Annoys me to blazes. Make mental note to ask Chief Patchouli about spatchcock cockerel for breakfast one of these days.

Cock's second crow: Dressed up and ready to take to the field for another day of slaying all manner of foul beasties, such as rats, Culinas and the foul Manitou...

Most of the morning: Bashing said creatures. I die once or twice, but thanks to the magic of Dark Life, I am resurrected and sent back into the field with little damage... except for maybe a bit of forgetfulness.

(Patychoulli Woolluhraa confronting the fiercesome Praying Manitou. EN GARDE! (She died for the first time of the day shortly after this picture was taken - ED.) )

Midday: All this fighting and spellcasting works up a major appetite. I find a quiet spot, get out my iron rations and Oriental green tea, and waste some time in the forests relaxing...

(Patychoulli having a moment of peace at lunchtime. (HEY - MY SCHOOL LUNCH COOKIE! :( - Patchey) )

Afternoon: more pain and suffering. Mostly inflicted on Manitous, but not totally... (pained sigh)

(Patychoulli Woolluhraa confronting another fiercesome Praying Manitou. DIE, VERMIN! (She died for the second time for the day shortly after this picture was taken - ED.) )

Late evening: after cutting my profits, I check my spoils. Amongst them are a couple of keys to chests strewn around town, holding goodies for newcomers such as me.

A DarkLife Level 1 Chest and its accompanying key. What treasures lie concealed within?

Several chests later, I'm about 200 gold richer, and my backpack is completely restocked on beneficial potions of all shades... Time to celebrate! I sadly confess that i can't really hold my mead well, but that doesn't stop me from having one glass... then having an early night. I'm sure I'll regret it tomorrow morning, but I don't have to train on New Year's Eve, so I don't care...


And while we're about it.... Have a great 2007, everyone!

Yours sincerely,

Patchyoulli Woolluhraaa
Vorpal Bunny Paladin Neophyte
Dark Life